I think the biggest reason I'm freaking out is because I feel so out of control. I've written the best book I can. But it's done now. There's no changing it. And now it's leaving me. Going out into the cold, cruel world. And while I can try to increase it's range, the public's reaction is largely out of my control. What if it isn't receive well, despite years of my best efforts?
I'm trying to do my best with marketing and such, but I signed with a small publisher, meaning I received no advance. So I'm trying to market on one income and I have three young children, so funds are extremely limited. Also, I'm not really one of the best salesman around. I don't like to be pushy and I'm not a braggart (at least, I don't think I am).
Also, what if it gets bad reviews? I'm promising myself I won't read reviews at all, because I don't want them to change the way I write, or worse, cripple me so I can no longer write at all.
I'm really worried about how this will affect my life. I'm a stay at home mom. I don't want that to change too drastically. I want to be there for my kids. See all their games and all their milestones.
I guess I'm scrambling to redefine myself and my life. Anytime I face a major change, it's scary and overwhelming and intimidating. And even though this is a good change, it's still frightening.
Also, just a little reminder to enter my contest to win a signed hardcover of Tracy Hickman's Song of the Dragon (this is one of those marketing attempts).